mom always insists on a bath before the monthly flea/tick treatment. luckily she also insists on handing out that extra special tasty treat at the same time. she calls in heartworm prevention medicine, but L. & i call it very very delish. i tend to favor this time of the month for very obvious reasons, being that i am a water-loving breed of dog & a food loving type too.but for L., this routine is not so fun.
she not only gets the dreaded-for-her bath (bassets don't usually like water & she is no exception)...and she gets her "special" ear treatment (you know, for looooong basset ears)...and because she is L.A.Z.Y....meaning moves only when she absolutely must & thus does not exercise enough to wear her nails down nicely, she also needs her monthly nail trimming.
sounds benign, right? all girls like a pedicure, don't they? ha! not L. you should see her freak out.
completely. Little Man must practically hog tie her (not really, but close) & speak to her in mystical tones while massaging her like she is in a hollywood salon for the works. mom works furiously with that clipper thingy...lots of aim & miss with moments of actual clipping - the sound of which sends L. into spasms of hound fury. i just hang close by & try to catch the clippings in my mouth for fun (& mom & Little Man gag if i do - extra fun for me)...but for poor L. this month was just a little bit different.
she had her usual stuff like me, but no nail trimming. the next day she found out why...
the annual vet visit!did L. know beforehand? i believe she did. when Little Man & mom were dragging her into the van, i detected an element of dread in her demeanor. lucky for me, i stayed behind & found a sunbeam for 2 quiet hours.
L. returned home with her tail firmly between her legs & Little Man in hysterics over her antics. oh i knew this experience had to have been ripe with juicy blog gossip! now, for those of you who have never been to the vet, let me recap my last visit...
smells. lots & lots of smells. i cannot sit still smells. other animals. lots of 'em. some growling, some barking, some howling, some hiding, some (heaven forbid) even in cages! then there are those nice people in scrubs that love to scratch my ears & sweet talk me. these folks take you to that mysterious room behind the door...ok so far.
then the real fun begins...poking, prodding, sample-taking, shots - all the while with lots of that sweet talking & ear scratching. i just go with it. it's only once a year. hey, mom says i've gotta do it & since she has the biscuits...
now with L. & her "temperament" the whole experience gets a little spicy. i know first hand. you see, mom used to take us together...talk about madness & chaos! i've seen L. refuse, people, *refuse* the nicey nice ear scratches. i've seen her bare her canines. i've heard her deep guttural growls. & this is all just at the scale! (do you think she's worried about her weight?)
the poking, the shots...the complimentary nail trim! the last time we went to the vet together, i was mortified when we returned to the waiting room...every single eye was trained on us, every face - canine & human - was wearing a countenance of pure dread. L.'s howling was that bad. one brave soul asked mom what had happened "in there" & mom nonchalantly replied, "oh, just a nail trim." eyes rolled, let me tell you! mouths whispered...& i know what they said..."drama queen!"
& now, i am guessing from all the people-talk that this most recent visit shows a serious etiquette breech, a steep decline in manners on L's part! you see, they had to *MUZZLE* her!! (oh, why didn't they send her home with that apparatus?) i overheard mom tell dad that the moment they set foot in the exam room, without even so much as a gesture, L. had her canines showing & the growl in full rumble. the assistant made one step & the growl became more insistent...should we muzzle her, the assistant asked. mom said oh yes, definitely, visions of blood & gore swimming in her head. bwhhaahahaha!!! wish i could have seen that! anyway, mom said L. continued to growl throughout the entire exam & found this ever so embarrassing...
you see, our vet is a neighbor & good friend of dad's. he's a nice guy. who wants to growl at a nice guy...save it for the burglar, i say! anyway, mom said he virtually ignored the growling baby, handled her like a pro, said he's seen much worse...making small talk while doing all the vet visit entails.
L. is now home, nicely recovered & on her cushy bed in the best nap mode.
i am dreaming of her wearing the latest in basset fashion...that muzzle! i think i will somehow request we go back to same-time appointments, just to see the show!dog - 0 vet - 1!!
what are you looking at?...i am NOT telling you my age!
that had grown so very annoying. mom is quite pleased that her plants are no longer bone burial grounds too.
on my sweet, second choice bed (the one in mom& dad's room - the one *lacking* memory foam, unlike 
L. is instantly on high dog-stalker alert. the growling begins. the canines are bared...
more time to stop & smell (& even *eat*) the flowers...
dang #$%*# glass!! one day that door will open & you will be MINE!!!...
